"He who trims himself to suit everyone will soon whittle
himself away."
Raymond Hull
Why is it when people meet / fall in love with another that they so hard to change them??? This is something I have trouble coming to grips with.
My understanding is that if you have fallen in love with a person, you have fallen in love with them for who they are, including their quirks, interests and passion for things in life.
All too often these days I see peoples relationships in turmoil or break up because one or the other partner is trying to change the other into what they would like a partner to be. Why? Why? Why?
My philosophy is that we are all individuals with our own interests, passions and personalities and in a relationship, be it a friendship or a romantic relationship, we should be encouraging and supportive.
In having individual interests and hobbies, it gives time out when needed and the opportunity to learn, live and grow. It also gives an opportunity to then be able to share with friends and partners.
Our passions should be fuelled with encouragement and support, not smothered and snuffed out like a candle.
I say:
- Don't go into a relationship thinking you can change someone. It's not
going to happen.
- I don't want someone trying to change me, I don't try to change other people.
- You have to be able to accept someone unconditionally or the
relationship isn`t going to work. You have to ask yourself "Can I live
with it?" If not then you need to move on.
Do what you feel in your heart
to be right, for you'll be criticized anyway. You'll be damned if you
do and damned if you don't.
Eleanor Roosevelt
Don't compromise yourself. You are all you've got.
Janis Joplin
Learn to live with self and you will learn to live with others.
Edgar Cayce
The best things in life are unexpected - because there were no expectations. Eli Khamarov
